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Tuesday, April 05, 2005

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Not for the first time,
She is having difficulty.

She is having difficulty
Getting back into her house
Through the cat-flap.

What she used to do
To avoid this recurring difficulty
Was to put a spare set
Of house keys
Just inside the cat-flap.

That way, when she went out
And forgot her house keys as usual,
She could simply put her hand
Through the cat-flap
Retrieve the keys,
Unlock the front door from the outside
And thus regain entry to her house
In a comfortable standing posture,
Without having to squeeze
Her whole body horizontally
Through the cat-flap each time.

But there was a downside
To this stratagem.

It was a facility
Which the local burglars
Made use of
Two or three times a week.

Much of her furniture,
Silver, jewellery, cut glass
And Old English watercolours
Have now gone.

She has had enough
Of this tiresome inconvenience
And takes a decision.

She decides
That she is going to get a man in.

She is going to get a man in
To enlarge the cat-flap
To a size which it is convenient
For a human being to crawl through.

But she is going to add
Two additional security features.

First, the cat-flap
Is going to have a large notice
Prominently displayed on the outside
Saying: "No Burglars".

Second, the cat-flap
Is going to be fitted with a strong lock
Which matches the lock
On the front door.

It is true that this new arrangement
May present a problem for the cat,
At least initially.

But it should very effectively

Deter burglars.


Images of cat-flaps
1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Images of house keys
1 2 3 4 5

Images of burglars
1 2 3 4 5 6 7


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